When asked: “How do you change, when you see things are not right?” Wessel Ganzevoort answers:

You begin with looking at what’s really there. Often we are accustomed to look at what’s not OK. And we will design the opposite of what we really are. … The starting point for development is to start with what your good at, and to acknowledge what doesn’t work. Also in this matter there no basic difference between people and organizations. If you are very insecure, the first question I would pose is: ‘OK, what’s wrong with that? Let’s just let this insecurity be.’ Acceptation is the most receptive ground for change.

To me Buddhism in a way seems to encourage you to step over your negative feelings. While I believe that only by fully accepting and acknowledging your negative emotions they will transform, when the time has come, and not any second sooner. I recognize these thoughts in this quote:

Wijze vrouwen – Women of wisdom by Susan Smit, on her talk to Zsuzsanna Budapest:

In dutch:

Zij had uitgesproken ideeën over de donkere kant van het leven, in het bijzonder die in onszelf. Ze vond dat we in de westerse maatschappij een neiging hebben om een zonnige, blije kant van onszelf te presenteren en al het andere weg te moffelen. ‘Ik kom liever uit voor mijn jaloezie, irritatie of boosheid. Het is onnatuurlijk om die emoties geen ruimte te geven. Om je de waarheid te zeggen,’ zei ze met een ondeugende blik, ‘I think even the Dalai Lama has some shit going on.

Translation:

She had very outspoken ideas on the dark side of life, in particular the dark side of ourselves. She thought that we in the West have a tendency to emphasize the sunny, happy side of ourselves and to smooth over all else. ‘I’d rather admit being jealous, irritated or angry. It’s not natural to deny those feelings. To tell you the truth,’ she said, with a mischievous smile, ‘I think even the Dalai Lama has some shit going on.’

Zsuzsanna Budapest:

Or, as is my interpretation of the famous Oscar Wilde quote:

The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it…

I first read this quote in English classes (introduced to the likes of Oscar Wilde by my Swinburne loving teacher) in a different way: ‘the only way to resist temptation is to give in to it’ and I still like this one better as it sounds even more true to the king of paradox.